A Typical MSA Meeting @ Ryerson University

Originally i wrote this only for close friends .. and MSA board members... but here you go ..
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A typical MSA meeting:

Disclaimer: All characters in this article are fictionist; any resemblance is coincidental (no-kidding)

Reading Instructions: Laughing is strictly prohibited; violators will be shot, survivors will be shot again!

Scenario: MSA Board Meeting for Grad Dinner

Characters:

President: Br Willi

V.P Br's: Br Gabber.

V.P Sister's: Sr Sue.

Finance Coordinator: Br Kinu

Communications: Br Bilu.

General Secretary: Br Half Absent.

Br Events: Br Always Absent

Sr Events: Sr K.D

Br Dawah: Br Khair inshaAllah.

Sr. Dawaj: Sr A.J.

Takbir: Sr Twinks.

Random Sisters: Sr. Ng, Sr. Sam

Random Brothers: Br B.B. (aka Br Bad Boy), Br BBC MSA (always up for events), Br Kazi, Br Gabber Junior, Br Benglori (*Proudly Mc Master Drop out*)

RSU = Ryerson Student’s Union

MSA =Muslim Student's Association

(Br Willi enters the room 45 minutes past the meeting start time, every one is waiting)

Br Willi: bismAllahAlRahmanAlRahim …………sorry people I am late (as usual)……. Does some one have a reminder?

(every one silently looks down) ….

Br Willi: inaLillah ….. .. I will say some thing short… let us remember …… (goes on at random stuff for five minutes heading no where)

(five minutes later……..)

Br. Bilu (*thinks*: ya Allah!!! ….. I could have finished this thing in 2 minutes…… when is the meeting finally going to start??)

(10 minutes pass … Br Willi is FINALLY done)

Br Willi: alright, so what we have on the agenda today, is the purchase of table cloths for the Grad Dinner,……… Br Kinu can you tell us the budget for this purchase?

Br Kinu: well from what I can perceive, the budget can allow dispensing the maximum of $2 (two dollars) for the purposed purchase, and that is pushing the limits! (in his famous "too much" style)

Sr. K.D: wha?

Sr. Sue: (*thinks*: MashaAllah this brother is so stingy. I am proud of him.)

Sr Sam: no actually what Br Kinu meant was not $2 but $200, and I will take care of taking this money out of Br Kinu. Trust me people, wallahe Br Kinu will give this money. wallahe trust me people

Br Kinu: ( looks around speechless and helpless)

Br Bilu: Hang on people, we have soooooooo many table cloths already, why don't we just use those?

Br Willi: (*ignoring Br Bilu*) AlhamdoLillah and if we cant find the money for this "project", we will do a shwarma sale in the grad dinner to make this money (thinks he's so smart)

Br Bilu: shwarma sale in a DINNER ??? No Br Willi, wuts wrong??

Br BB: (*thinks*: I think Br Willi had a little too much of banana shake last night )

(partying at Br Bilu’s place)

Br Gabber: (enters the room late): sorry people I had a meeting with the top 10 at RSU ….. alright so what are we talking about ………. Aha I see today we have Grad dinner on the agenda right?

Br. Willi, no Br Gabber we have purchase of table cloths for Grad dinner on agenda. Another committee under supervision of Sr Ng is taking care of the dinner.

(Sr Ng * blinks her eyes with combination of pride and modesty* )

Br. Gabber: (pride in voice) mashaAllah great, I am sure RSU will have no problem with our purchase of table cloths.

(exits the room saying "I have to make a phone call, I will be back shortly")

Br Kazi: did any one hear Br Bilu? We already have so many table cloths from previous events.

Sr. K.D: Those table cloths don't match the color of our theme. We cant have them.

Br Khair inshaAllah: khair inshaAllah, I think we should include CDA in this important decision, they have been doing great. They converted one sister to islam yesterday, at wonderland.

Br. B.B: People I would like to play the role of the bad boy here, where is this meeting going any ways? What is the point of table cloths? Why don't we sit on the floor and eat the muslim way?

Sr A.J: (in her famous humble tone): I think Br B. Boy has a very good point, this is a very good way of dawah, CDA will be very happy with this decision.

(Br. Gabber enters the room again while Sr A.J is talking)

Br Gabber: very good point, I think RSU will have no problem with this decision.

(exits the room again "I have to make a quick phone …… ")

Sr K.D: this does not fit with the theme of our program, we have to have a specific color of the table cloths:

Br Kinu: May I request your highness to enlighten the congregation of the RMSA board with the intended color of the .. the … the table cloths?

Sr K.D: I was thinking of pink (*her eyes glow thinking of the matching color of her pink frock*)

Sr. A.J: (*thinks*: oh crap, I was wearing green)

Sr. Sam: (*thinks*: wallahe No way, I was wearing BLACK)

Sr Twinks: (*thinks*: subhanAllah mashaAllah ……..Astagferullah whats wrong with this sister*………. AlhamdoLillah inshaAllah)

Sr. Sue: (*whispers*): Sr K.D we have brothers in the room.

Sr. Ng: dyem fyne idea Sr KD yo, later on we'd make da brotha's wear dem pink table cloths and make dem look like punks. That'd be sooooooooo hype yo.

Br. Bilu: (*about to faint*)

Br Willi: I would like to believe we should make a criteria and …….

Br Gabber Junior: AlhamdoLillah MashaAllah if the sisters like it I think we should go ahead with it.

Br Benglori: (*Proudly*) when I was at Mc Master we used pink ……..

Br Kazi: (*cuts off Br Benglori*) and I think pink color will be very good for dawah to non muslims, specially while I have invited Sister Rozi and Sister Noori from the RSU I think they will be pleased with this color (*his eyes glow for unknown reasons*)

Br Benglori: and I think benglroi fish curry would look really good on pink table cloths

(*proudly looks around after making this point thinking he’s so smart*)

Br Bilu: Fish? Ah that’s where the smell was coming from … You have some of it in your back pack,…… don’t you ? (Cover’s his nose)

(EVERY BODY in the room covers their noses)

Br Benglori: (in very low voice): yes a few pieces, but that’s because I love fish.

(Gets thrown out of the room)

Sr K.D: so I was saying that pink ………

(Br Gabber enters the room again)

Br Gabber: I think RSU will have no problem with this (exits the room again with his phone in hand)

Br. Bilu & Br Kinu: *faint*

Br Willi: I strongly believe that we should make a criteria.

Gives criteria

• 1- It should be at least 2'X 2'
• 2- It should be stored in the MSA office
• 3- It should be approved by the board.
• 4- It should be approved by myself.
• 5- If any of the above is not achievable, sisters should purchase what ever they like.

(2 hours pass.)

Br Bilu is half ready to resign (seriously)

Br Kinu has already thrown his resignation on the table for 23^rd time. (every time some one is about to approve it, kinu takes it back.)

Br: Willi: khalaas inshaAllah we will buy purple color for table cloths, it fits MY criteria (which has been changed for the 9^th time from "public" input. *public = Sisters Only*). If sisters still don't like it then we can decide about it in the next meeting inshaAllah,

Br BBC MSA: I will volunteer for purchase of the table cloths:

Sr Ng: (*thinks:* subhanAllah, dis dawg is amazing yo, didn't say a wod in da whole dymn meetin and is first to volunteer, I gotta add him in my dymn volunteer crew yo. )

Sr Sam: people trust me, wallahe black color is the best for this purpose.

Br Willi: alright people we will decide on the color of the table cloths for the grad dinner in the next meeting (*which is scheduled to be after the Grad dinner*)… meeting adjourned ….

Br Willi: people Hang on for dua (another 10 minutes!!)

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P.S: this was intended to be a very serious article, …..if you find it otherwise, there is something wrong with your sense of “seriousity”